Thursday 18 April 2013

:(

when i see the date 4/10/2013 i though i had not updated my blog for months. Though/dream always not the real one, it always different with what really happening.
i always admit that i am a person who fall in love easily but i not the betrayer type. i am not a hero but i wont make a mistake that same as the past. it had been years and times whereby i dint fall in a serious love. i though i am matured enough to handle a love but in fact, i'm so sorry to you which i feel i not matured enough for you. i always bring tears to you, i am so sorry... i couldnt protect you in the way u like somemore i need your care and love...
love always a so wonderful thing in my life although i keep on, falling, falling and falling. i dunno why am i such a weak person. i fall easily, emo easily, emotion break down easily front of the one who i really care and love. i feel myself a weak one, not suit to be with you, i am such a loser.... i always bring negative message to you, always make you angry, always make you this and that, i am such a fool, sometime i know i really a wood.
argumentative topics always occured in us. you have different view point as well as me. we are both protecting ourself in our facts. it is funny when it come for initial argumentative topics. but since got once, things going on. it was like the argumentative topics another way how we interact and chat, talk as well. i will not get angry easily in an argumentative topics. however, i get myself a serious moody one, i feel i am so weak... why cant i just come down my emotion, stay cool and steady, settle it nicely? think it wisely? i am just so weak and stupid. ><
sometime there was something in my mind. shall this path of road continue or stop? if stop, thr will be dissapointing the girl, which the one i promise myself the most, i wont let you go. the promise is not just a promise, it is when i am really care you, i really love you, i cant without you.

i know i am not a real positive person indeed, i tend to hurt myself in violence way, i hurt myself, i just dunno how to express myself. it's like a boiled water cannot come out from the water, the full water pail cannot be leak out, i really want to understand more on you my dear :(

i tends to emo myself because i am those type ppl of which i wont bring forward my emotion, my expression,it may end today then end. You are the one who different from me, u hold ur feeling, u hide ur feeling, it permeanently inside ur heart. I better put it on my face but hide it inside my heart is because i know you are different. Dear, i doesnt mean to hurt you, i doesnt mean i dont wan to tell u, i hope you know that....