forgive=humble

human tends to forgive because human are humble.

there is always time that i blame myself wrong on how and why i am the spoiler which interrupt into both my friends life? Why shall i there to make an influence? why? why i had to do so?

whenever you would like to act irresponsible, there is the time you given yourself to admit some wrong that you did. I admit that i really handle my problem very very bad, very very poor indeed. I selfishly thought that everyone shall go what i thought but i never consider what people feel. At last ends up, i disturbed their pace and  things starting to change.

however, did all that my fault? did all that what i made? they tends to get cover without my notice due they fear that i will involved again. I dint blame anyone, i think that is the best way in where good for all. the main point is that in which they try to get back as their own relationship but at last it might failed? so what shall i guilty all this about? it not my fault to make all these, these happened all on themselves.

human also tends to make some change when they failed. not sure weather it is a good news or a bad news for me, the chance for me to change is not long after that. now, i faced a girl which look alike, familiar feeling as last time. however, i trying hard to make a full stop whenever i think it will be too over. I also wont let the same mistake happened on myself for twice, i dint have high expectation on myself, however, i hope that i handle my thing better than past.

SMILE =D

'

happy moments always fill the time and it makes the time passed that fast. However, time dint bring away your frustration, never brought away what suppose you dont want. The emotional just save at different file before you really get a free time to open and think about that. 

why couldnt i handle my thing in a better way? or in other hand, since when i had such a high expectation on myself, since when i started to have such a high requirement on my ownself? do this a good change or a bad change? as always, thr r a lot of question in my mind that remian unanswered.

this is what i saw from a book. If you threat your frustrating as salt, when you put it in a cup of water(plain life) you will feel how salty the water actually is. instead, while you put the salt into a big lake and u taste the water, the taste of the lake water doesnt shows up how salty the lake water was. It means that, why you restricted, why you wanna to closed up ur problem in a small small place, in such a way of comparing your cases to something good? why dont just we as a human being just look through problem in a more positive way?

改变不了的改变

在你觉得自己成长中带有改变的时候，你却发现了自己其实有些东西，有些事情上面的处理并没有改变到。在朋友与仰慕的人当中，我的改变，我的处理方案上面都有好更坏的转变。对仰慕的人没有了以往我自己那么偏激的占有欲，反之，却对朋友有了一种强烈的占有欲。当朋友没有达到我心里的某个阶段，我会很生气，很懊恼，吃醋等等。我朋友对我说了这么一番话


如果生活是茶水，那么感情、金钱、地位都是杯子。
沒有杯子我們们喝不到水，杯子只是工具。
杯子不一定要最好，茶好才是好。
太多的时候，我們烦恼、郁闷、忧愁，都是因为太看重手中的杯子，而忘了杯中的茶香。

我读了读，我发现原来其因真的很有道理，是否我们人生当中有时候为了坚持某一个东西一定要达到自己想要的目的的时候，我们却忘了自己要开心，要快乐，别为了执着两个字蒙蔽了双眼。谢谢这位朋友，无论这个到底对与否，我觉得至少它暂时通了缠绕我整整两天的问题。我不是个会乱想的人，可是乱想起来蛮可怕的。


我人生有三个宗旨，不断提醒我自己要开心，要快乐，要对自己好一点。
第一　人生要懂得知足常乐，不要因为没有什么而埋怨，要为自己拥有的二开心的生活
第二　珍惜当时，感情是个不会回头的东西，就算此刻是朋友，好情人，谁敢保证下一秒一定幸福？谁敢保证？
第三　不要太注重生活上的烟雾，总记得要为自己而快乐，这样才能让身边的人快乐。


这三个人生目标都是我不停不停的提醒自己加油，开心，不要烦恼的人生目标。


就是因为自己占有欲强，总在不时地提醒自己，当你知道后又能表现出什么呢？宁可普普通通，简简单单就好了。


暂时宣布情绪稳定，停笔。

virgin business

nothing special, it just a normal 50 ringgit note, for you, for me for everyone, it's just a note. However, this note not only important but also my first virgin experience. Since i was born i am so lucky in which my parents doesnt allowed to work anyhow no matter family is in both good or bad condition, hence, this time counted as my first working experience? nvm lar, not counted also... lol... as wht old ppl said, the ppl who use money never considered how hard the people earn money, now, i totally understand the feel, it is totally tiring job, from the minute u buy ingredient, cook until selling part, there is no any easy part for each step... unfortunate, i had no time to take photo for the food and myself and only at last, take the 50 note =='

what the different between "friendship" and someone that u "admire". friendship define as some1 that u could reach, chat, communicate laugh and smile with but when the person is the one u admire, she is the idol and you could only be a fans. Idol wont do a lot of thing to entertain their fans but only a small appreciation of idol could really joy the day of the fans. Once u feel how cold the idol was, u will b totally dissapointed. On flea market, i totally could understand that feeling of being ignore. It is like some1 tha u know, u helped her before, but still, u r so transparent until she never wanna turn back and make a greet.

Addicted

it had a long that i dint type english for my blog. Hmmm.... presentation slides haven done for both pengajian malaysia and also management principle. Still, i had time to write my blog =.= just because... i.... insomia =.= reason? hmmm....

a question that appeared in my mind and repeating asking myself, do a guy blogwritter must be some1 that emo? aikss... i duno lar =.= never really thought that much. Already a period of time where i dint wait for some1 message ady. Tonight, again i wait for some1 message until cannot fall asleep again >.< die lor... there is a feeling in which i really feel that i improved? handle case better? I really dint hope much for the reply, i am repeating telling myself, I really own much already. the feeling inside my heart is just weird and it is too hard to describe. i hope myself handle this case in a better way but what should i do? make the step consistent? make the step quicker? make the step slower? step up or step down? there are tons of questions that i throw on myself. I hope that i never lost you no matter in what way, what form what condition we are. I fear of losing, i fear of being a loser too... some1 who fall for times are really fear of lose... Please, not leaving me unreasonable, i could just do anything to remain at the origin...

你在烦恼什么？

感觉是一种很奇特，很奥妙的东西，我。。。不会形容这份来得突然的感觉到底是怎样，我只是不敢多想，可是却有时候会乱乱想。

你说缘分的定义该是怎样？在你知道及不知道对方会出现的时候遇到？还是你真的只要心里想着他/她，你真的就能见到她了？当见不到的时候，你心里会想着她，手上拿着电话，欲给她发讯息又怕干扰到她，到最后，等，等，等，等。。。

别人说，走的太快不是好事，却有人说感觉对了就不要再等了。什么样才是感觉对，什么时候才是感觉不对？打从不认识到现在，突然间不懂什么原因就这样就熟了，感觉好像。。。哈哈哈，我不会形容啦~ @.@

没有信心加上自己尊严却让我很疑惑，我过不了心里的那一关。可是，这重要吗？我还是觉得对方的想法跟感觉比较重要。 当你有了失去的感觉后，你就会懂，拥有少少总好过失去全部。就算感觉对了你察觉不到，我觉得磁场这个东西总会让你知道的。。哈哈哈，在自我疑惑的时候，告诉自己，已经拥有很多了，还需要为了舍而烦恼呢？