Wednesday 12 December 2012

overloaded pail...

when a pail was loaded full with water, so what shall you do? comman sense we will pour the water to another empty pail. Same for me, when i was full loaded with bad emotion, i will unload the bad emotion, sad tone into another "pail", which was my bloggie. I am not a good writer, with a lot of type error and manglish, LOLZ.

when you feel that, you are the one who own something more than friendship but still a bit lesser than relationship, that particular people is defined as "幸福的人". if that GOD let me to choose, i rather be a just normal human being, best friend or even we named as so called "brother/sister" really that good? friends around you might envy or jealous bout this kind of friendship, for me, not really. the one who in the situation only will know what kind of feeling of being such status of friend.

you asked, you said " the feeling towards you is good friend, is best friend, love do not considered". So, a question that i would like to ask you in return, do you know that, human was made of blood and meat, as what movies said, human with 七情六欲,三魂七魄,难道日久就不会生情咩? if you asked the word of weather we are POSSIBLE? i would answer, if i doesnt believe in myself,who are the one who going to give me confidence to believe that we are possible?

i not an introvoke, so i tend not to be silent for every single moment of my life. when i tend to be silent, either i am listening to someone, or else that i fall in to deep, bad emotion. you told me that, something that is yours then it will be yours , when something not yours, then that thing is not yours. if the people purposely to do something to avoid you, no matter it is just a simple stuff, it also could be the thing to avoid you. as for you, as you do not have the feeling on me, so how hard i do, it come with no mean. when you have the feeling on him, no matter how you set urself single this moment, there will be something in future. it is not about rules and regulation, limit and limitation, it just because who i am, who he is. smile hardly is something that i did my best so that it wont look too bad of my voice, too serious of my bad emotion. I know i am not a good actor but i really could not cheat myself. those kind of jealousy is something that you never realise, always that i said i am jealous of this and that, you just take it easy, you never know how serious i am. i know i am joker but i never take love as a joke, indeed.

i know, friendship forever not a nice words that you used on him, cause you hope something more, not now but maybe future. As for me, u did keep repeating this kind of words with me, it just because who i am, Lee Wai Hong. I know, as an individual, we should appreciate every single moment of our life, every single person who besides us, friends and family. I saying all these, i know you are pressured and tension, so sorry, i dint mean to force you or what, i just simply release my emotion, my truth feeling inside my heart. Still, i appreciate the time being with you, the willingness of you to accompany the bored me with a call in the late night although you are sleepy, so thankful and that was really touch. Friends? Let it be as long as you happy. :)

study? NO!

fate really decided everything. Last night i adjusted the setting hence i could see every update of yours. I'm not sure weather is "lucky" or what, i saw ur status, which later been delete. thanks for letting me know all that, sorry for disturbing you, so so sorry.... again, i am just a foolish, who cry for no one. Damn, sometime i think is it being a gay is better, i feel my foolish keep repeating in my life, keep on and keep on repeating, why ha?

christmas again, i still remeber last christmas, a tall girl, a short guy, a promise to go back hometown celebrate her birthday, which was a good friend( what the guy thought). This year, still, a tall girl, a short guy, a promise to visit her during her free time..... Midnight long talk, a short guy, a tall girl, too loud and annoyed the parents of the tall girl, this year, a short guy and a tall girl, an excited conversation, made her sister was annoyed by the noice in late night. last christmas, she promised will visited to kampar, to see so call me, this year, she promised, one day later maybe when she get time to w.malaysia, she will come over to visit kampar, me again. Two different incident, two different people but bring the same effect, same feel to me. I think i shall seek and look for LORD or GOD, do last decade of my life did something that are very wrong, why things keep just repeating the same on me, again and again, again and again. Or just i am the one who escaped from fact, i never face my problem properly, i should not handle it in the same way, i know i should not blame anyone but myself, i should learn from mistake, not run from mistake. Lee Wai Hong, u can do it!

我相信这个世界上异性间有纯友谊,可是不是你和我。



不要知道的太多,會難過

today i saw my friend shared this post, so i oso share share, LOL afterwards i delete it =.= lolz. actually i am not sure what actually this related to me but just so true, something the one who are stupid is the one who blessed and own happiness. my curiousity never ends, this make me know more, more and more which is at last, the result is so cruel. Haha.